"We have Tsukuyomi at home"


This composition is heavily inspired (almost to the point of plagiarism tbh) by "Moonlight at Midday" by Tsukuyomi.

Not all suffering is created equal. Yet, desiring fairness in such things enforces jealousy and shame.
"Why do other people suffer when they seemingly have it better than me?"
"Why do I suffer if other people have it worse than me?"
This is a mindset I still struggle with. Suffering isn't a zero-sum game, yet why do I feel this way?
Perhaps rationalizing emotions with logic is inherently absurd.
Either way, the spilling of these feelings must be something I keep to myself, I've come to learn.

I was going down the morse code rabbit hole, and I noticed that the dits and dahs make interesting rhythms.
"SOS" in particular has a nice rhythm that I use in the bridge.
I centered the song around that, and the ocean imagery came to mind as a result.

After deciding which character this song will be for, I've decided to make it a girl from PRiSM, Chloe.
I have a basic dynamic for the group, but I'd like to make a visual novel for them.

The lyrics are intentionally vague. It has many interpretations for me personally, so it's hard to make a definitive interpretation.
I guess at it's most universal interpretation, it's a song about relinquishing an unrealistic ideal. Maybe losing yourself along the way.
In a more specific interpretation, it's about committing an emotional suicide of sorts. Tossing away the version of you that expresses feeling, yet hanging on to some hope for rescue.

Sometimes I look back at my old works, wondering when my songs became so dark.
It feels like back then I wrote solely for the love of songwriting.
I still love songwriting, but there's a charm in my writing from back then.
I didn't know any better. 
Songwriting now is also a means of escapism, which was completely absent back then.
It doesn't make me sad about the present, but it does make me nostalgic for the past.
Maybe this is why wl2 kanade makes me so emotional...

In the future, I'd like to make music that hones in to various themes present in this song. 
I want to be less vague for the next song.
I want to write about the blur between envy and love. I think it would be an interesting topic to explore.

あいなきせんぼう, 
Envy without Love.
Does envy come before love?
Does love come before envy?
Does envy come from the absence of love?
Maybe true love requires the complete absence of envy?

But probably, the difference between envy and love comes from the love you have for yourself.
You can't love someone without loving yourself.
"I cherish the person you are, but I am happy with the person I am as well."
Love without envy.

But if self love comes from the value others place on you, then true love is impossible.
If self love isn't possible this way, maybe it's better to throw away the idea of self love.
In refuge, seeking love from others, which cannot be done without self love.

A toxic catch 22 born from a toxic mindset, leaving only two outcomes:
A love without envy, or envy without love.

In another layer of envy, envying others for having the inital spark of love to get out of this catch 22.
It's a toxic cycle.

And I think the ideas behind it are similar to certain themes of SOS.
Where SOS is the outcome of a problem, this "envy without love" highlights the problem itself.

Im hoping to make an MV for SOS, at the very least a lyric video.
I'm inspired by avogado6's artstyle.

Thank you to ouun_nemuru for the jp translation. I'm very thankful for the opportunity to write music in a language I'm not fluent in.